“Do you enjoy hurting others?
It seems quite impossible to avoid hurting others with what one may do or say. If your intention was to aggress and hurt, you will achieve just that; and at times, you did that unintentionally. This is because we are bound to different realities and concepts of things. If all could adhere to and adopt one definition and meaning to each thing, the road we travel on wouldn’t need to have more than one lane. But unfortunately, with one group feeling the need to dominate over others, there cannot be such thing as perfect harmony and mutual respect, far more so in the absence of trust and solidarity. In the fight for survival, hurting others seems to be a must, something one has to do despite oneself; nothing personal, just self-defense. It’s a game one cannot partake in, if one is made mostly of nerves; and yet the most sensitive individuals may happen to be the most offensive ones. That’s the problem.
The brain can’t afford to hold on offenses. The moment it receives them, it transmits them straight to the heart to deal with every bit of them beat by beat. Emotional pains take longer to dissolve than physical pains. The scar left in the brain or heart takes longer to peel than one left on the skin while the scar left on the skin takes longer to vanish and keeps memory of the offense living longer. Then, one ought to decide which part of someone to hurt if one intends to ask for forgiveness later on.
But let me ask this one question, “Do you enjoy hurting others?
If your answer is “No”, then why do you tell them the “Truth”?
If your answer is “Yes”, then, why don’t you tell them the truth, for we know the truth hurts?
It seems that whether or not you tell the truth, people will get hurt.
But what is the truth to tell? If it's the truth about things everyone has a different concept about, then what makes your own concept true and theirs wrong? That is an arrogance that can earn you many enemies. Because, you will be asked for evidences you can’t provide. People feel safe and secured by what they know or have been taught to be the truth; and here one comes with something totally different that takes away their feeling of security and safety and gives them fear. Even if you are telling the truth, how do you expect them to react? What if they were right and you were wrong?
They say people can see you better than you can see yourself. But will you accept to be seen as you are? Can a friend of yours safely tell you the truth about you without you feeling hurt? Will you risk losing your friend to tell him/her the truth about him/her? Your enemies or strangers can be more sincere with you than your own friends can because your friends are afraid to hurt you, so therefore leave you in your ignorance. While telling the truth may hurt someone, not telling the truth may hurt them even more. Do you agree with your friend because he/she is your friend despite that he/she is wrong? Do you disagree with someone your friend disagrees with despite that the person is right? Will you tell your friend he/she is wrong and make him/her feel small before his/her opponent? Sometimes it’s not until you and your friend fall apart that you tell each other the truth about each other, for your newborn enmity has set you free from the hypocrisy you were hiding from each other. What kind of friend have you been to your friends? Then respond to the question, “Do you enjoy hurting others?